There are plenty of situations in every area of life where almost everything depends on how we communicate. Think of job interviews, company discussions, conflicts at home, or even raising children.
That’s why we’re devoting an entire module to communication at the soon-to-be-launched Guerrilla Mentor Club. And in this article, as a first step, I want to share some basics of win-win communication with you.
Why Is It Important To Communicate Well With People?
Any businessman with a great career will be asked, “ What’s the secret to success?” question is almost certain to be answered: you need to be able to communicate well! It’s not enough that you have a bombastic idea or you have a super understanding of something, you also need to be able to convince others of that.
Just a few situations where communication is key
In a job interview – but in any exam situation – you need to be able to show that you are a good, fit for the job.
In the workplace, you need to be able to say no, represent yourself and your ideas, and you need to learn to work with your co-workers.
In your private life, you have to please yourself with the great Him, you have to conquer your future partner.
Day by day, you need to understand yourself with your children, your narrower and wider environment.
In a conflict, you need to be able to argue confidently, to clear up misunderstandings.
And if a negotiation situation arises – e.g. you want to raise your salary – you need to learn to present your values and results convincingly.
There is still plenty to go on, one thing is for sure: effective communication can be a turning point in many cases and even the key to your career.
But what does it mean to communicate well?
Communicating well is all it takes to communicate assertively. Yes, but there are still a lot of misconceptions about self-assertion. These are good for nothing more than to constantly overwhelm yourself, and be dissatisfied and unhappy. Let’s look at just the 3 most common misconceptions!
Myth # 1 Communicating for yourself = being self-conscious.
Myth # 3 Communicate assertively = either say yes or no.
In contrast, the reality is that self-advocacy is never a competition! To enforce your will, you don’t necessarily have to lose the other, in fact! Effective communication is practically a kind of balance , the point is to express your needs while taking into account the needs of the other.
So you can only bring something to the negotiating table if you know what your needs are, you know what you want, what you don’t want, and you can represent that.
Here’s a quick communication checklist!
Please think about your last work or private conversation in which you wanted to convince the other party of something! Can you put a checkmark behind these questions?
Do I know what I want to achieve and what I don’t want to achieve? Am I aware of my purpose in the conversation?
Did I make it clear to the other what I wanted?
Did I just pay attention to myself or the other one?
Do I claim or ask?
Can I articulate, and recount the other’s specific needs?
Do I see clearly what he is recommending to me? Did I match my own needs?
Is there a condition under which I can accept your other offer?
If so, you can be sure that you are on the right track and you have every chance to end the “negotiation” with a win-win outcome. If not, then no problem, communication is one of the skill areas that can be super developed. Here, too, the only point is: don’t let your poorly functioning routines lead you.
Why are family relationships important? What problems do you face? Why can the relationship get worse? How can these be improved?
Family relationships play an extremely important role in your life. The family provides you with protection, security, and support.
A well-functioning family helps to overcome difficulties and also supports the personal development of family members.
Why are family relationships so important?
The first community experiences of our lives belong to the family, and it is the most emotional community in terms of emotion.
It is important for each family member to be emotionally attached to other family members and the institution of the family. Reciprocated emotions provide support for family members in more difficult life situations.
The family has a number of individual support functions. For example, children receive from their parents the knowledge they need to succeed in life.
Family relationships also play a major role in providing physical, mental, and emotional needs. When you don’t feel supported within a family, it can be very stressful from a spiritual standpoint. That’s where you won’t get help from where you’d expect the most.
The family is, at best, like a safe castle where you get protection. You can relax the battles that take place in your life, and then after the rest you can return to the arena with renewed vigor.
What are the common problems and disagreements in a family?
Conflicts are a natural part of life, so they occur within a family.
However, these conflicts of interest need to be addressed and then properly addressed. This is because unprocessed conflicts remain below the surface.
The idea that time will heal wounds is wrong. Family members need to settle their differences among themselves.
1. Lack of free decisions
“That’s what I’m saying!” This attitude has a devastating effect on family relationships, as it hinders individual self-realization. Of course, the existence of a hierarchy is important in childhood, but dictatorial relationships within a family can also develop between adults.
An oppressive relationship, it puts a lot of strain on the soul.
2. Ignoring each other’s needs
What is the reason family members do not heed each other’s requests?
oppressive family relationships;
lack of communication;
competition with each other.
Whatever the root cause, it is disrespectful to ignore the needs of others.
3. Exclusion of family members
Exclusion from a community can cause very deep wounds.
Why exclusion?
due to a different opinion from the other family members;
because of oppressive family ties.
When someone within a family receives constant criticism or feels that it is a burden to the community, it greatly destroys their self-esteem. Because of this, an excluded family member may become introverted in the outside world as well, because he or she may think that others will treat him or her in the same way.
4. Lack of deep conversations
We can only get to know each other through deep and honest conversations. For we do not see into the other’s thoughts, we can only assume what his ideas really are.
Without deep conversations, we will only have superficial relationships, which increases the risk of misunderstandings.
Why Are Family Relationships Important? How Can You Improve On Them?
5. Lies
“What will the other say if I tell the truth?”
Behind the lies is always the compulsion to comply. You may be trying to get rid of awkward situations or gain an advantage over others.
A lie destroys the life of a family because in its presence a calm environment does not develop and trust in each other diminishes.
6. No apology
Humility is a great virtue, lack of a hotbed of conflict.
Sometimes you project your bad mood onto a family member and hurt him or her as a result. It is better to take responsibility for your actions as soon as possible, that caused negative feelings.
The sooner the conflict is resolved, the sooner peace will be restored to the family.
7. Blurring problems
The fact that we are not talking about an existing problem is not yet solved. Unresolved problems cause constant tension in a family’s life.
Family members may pretend that everything is fine, although that is not the reality. Problems can be solved honestly and in the eyes of each other, but that also requires courage and openness.
How can family relationships be improved?
There is no such thing in the world that is incorrigible, so it is with family relationships. A prerequisite for this, in turn, is a willingness on the part of each family member.
In the rest of this writing, I will list ten characteristics that are important for you to build balanced family relationships.
1. Honesty
I say what’s in me.
This is when family members actually understand each other. Exploring inner feelings helps you see what’s going on in the other. This greatly reduces the risk of misunderstandings.
2. Acceptance
There are common habits and similar positions in a family. However, differences also appear, which is completely natural.
Tolerance is present in a healthy family atmosphere, family members provide each other with the opportunity for self-realization.
3. Openness
Openness is extremely important within a family. When someone is open, they listen to the other and can learn from them.
The insights and life experiences of others can help individual family members solve their problems.
4. Deep conversations
Getting to know each other and collaborating effectively is also supported by discussions in a family. In addition, deep conversations bring family members closer together, strengthening the bond between them.
5. Continuous communication
It is not enough to discuss family matters once a year because circumstances and the perspectives of family members can also change. What was appropriate for the family a year ago may not be the case at the moment.
Formulation and timing also play an important role in communication. Despite good intentions, a poorly chosen date or an incorrectly worded sentence can cause inconvenience.
6. Attention
The formula is simple: your thoughts are fully present either in a conversation or elsewhere. Because it is not possible to be half present, half pay attention to the other.
When are you really present? When do you really pay attention to your family member?
you look at the other while talking;
you are interested in asking questions;
not only what is happening or curious, but also the feelings that have arisen in the other;
it is important for you to understand him;
you only give him advice if you ask.
Why Are Family Relationships Important How Can You Improve On Them
7. Assuming your own personality
In a supportive family environment, it is much easier for you to take on your own personality. And it also helps to make the process easier in the outside world.
You may look at the world from a completely different perspective than your family members. Because of this, you will not be disadvantaged.
8. Responsibility
We affect each other within a family when one family member is stressed, it can easily spread to others. That is why you are also responsible for your own physical and mental balance.
The family member in charge knows that any imbalance will affect the entire community.
9. Conscious energy investment for a peaceful family environment
Maintaining a peaceful, tranquil family environment requires continuous energy investment from family members. The peace of the family needs to be cared for in the same way as a flower garden.
For this, it is important to have common, deep conversations and for family members to strive for their personal spiritual balance.
10. Supporting each other in self-realization
The family functions as a hinterland and a sure point if it really is to play its part.
The family has a big role in the self-realization of each family member. You can recharge in a family environment or, if necessary, receive spiritual and financial support.
